Did you ever have a moment in time?
It may be fleeting. It may hang with you for awhile.
Let's face it we all have them. From the memory of a beautiful Sterling Silver rose from a rose garden in Hamilton, NY to Buster Brown shoes and socks soaking wet from jumping in a mud puddle in Wampsville, NY when I was a kid. Dad was the first of the many May baby b-days in our family....followed by Mary, Zeke, Peggy and Paul. I also got married in May and my former mother-in-law has a May b-day....(Photo above by Paul F. Gero.)
Oh yeah...you betcha, we have moments.
On May 4, 1929....a moment in time brings back the memory of the birth of Robert B. Gero. My dad!! How cool is that? Of course, I wasn't there....but Dad was.
He was born Robert Breining Gero to Paul Essex Gero and Alice Elizabeth Breining on May 4, 1929 in Manistique, Michigan.
Last year on July 3, 2006, in another moment in time, Dad died in Columbus, WI with me by his side. He is buried in Manistique, Michigan. Mom, Paul, Uncle Dan and I went to bury him there. Again, another moment in time.
During the past 10 months since Dad's death, there have been many moments in time. Many things that make me think of him.
As a history major, I've always been intrigued by dates. In the news lately has been the talk of Kent State University. On May 4, 1970, several students were gunned down on the campus of that university. Again, another moment in time. I always remembered that date, because it was Dad's birthday.
Since 10 months have passed, I have decided that I'd like to share with you the memories I shared with those who attended my dad's funeral in July of 2006. My siblings, Paul and Ruth, have shared theirs in their blogs and Paul encouraged me to share mine. It just took me many moments in time to get to that point of sharing. Mary also has shared her recollections, too.
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"If you want to win friends, make it a point to remember them. If you remember my name, you pay me a subtle compliment; you indicate that I have made an impression on you. Remember my name and you add to my feeling of importance."
"Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get."
- Dale Carnegie
One of my earliest and fondest memories of Dad was when I was about 7 years old and we lived in Hamilton, NY. My dad took me to a Dale Carnegie course that he was attending. For those of you that don’t know, Dale Carnegie was a man who was a self-help author and trainer. He used various methods for his clientele to use to remember things and to keep it together. I remember how we could learn the 13 original colonies by a simple process of “picturing” words associated to the state. For example, Delaware would be represented by a delicate blue plate. The 2nd state is Pennsylvania and on top of that delicate blue plate is a number 2 yellow pencil. The process goes on and on until you have created an entire word/picture association in your mind. I found this method of learning to be so beneficial. My dad was so pleased that he could take me to his class that he introduced me by popping me up on his shoulders and said this is my daughter, Peggy.
Dad taught us many things about life by the things that he did. He loved to garden. He had gorgeous roses in Hamilton, New York. I still remember the beautiful lavender/purple rose called a Sterling Silver rose. To this day, it’s one of my favorites. In later years, we used to give Dad a hard time about gardening in his “old street shoes.” He generally took the teasing very good naturedly. He always reminded us that if we dished it out, we had to take it in return.
My dad was an avid reader. His nose was always in a book, a magazine or a newspaper. I know that I acquired my love of reading through his example. It amazed me that he read books like Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand and biographies about leaders in our country and books by Taylor Caldwell. When I was in the 4th grade in Princeton, IL I had the distinction of having read the most books in the class. I believe I read about 84 books that year. We only needed to have read 20 to get a certificate. I had stumbled onto several great books about the founding fathers that brought alive to me, through the written word, their lives and times. To this day, whenever I can, I sneak in a book or two or three. By his example, he showed us that reading really truly was fundamental.
Dad was a very hard worker. He did this as my mom was a stay-at-home mom. He always instilled in us the value of working hard. To this day it continues. Many of my friends often tell me that I make them tired by the things that I do. Hard work was a value that came from my dad and my mom, too. When we lived in Princeton, IL we all had duties that we had to do around the house that earned us our allowance. We did have to work for an allowance. My job, now don’t laugh, was to pick up dog poop in the yard from Blackie the German Shepherd. I had to do this job on Saturday mornings. One day when I was in 5th or 6th grade I said to him, “Dad, I really don’t mind doing this job, but I surely don’t want others to see me doing this job or to know what I have to do to earn my allowance.” He just laughed and said that there are often jobs that we don’t like to do but we have to accept our responsibilities and follow through. I find it very interesting that 35 years later, I am still picking up dog poop for all the dogs that I own.
In 1976, I graduated from Columbus High School and embarked on a journey to Ripon College a small, private liberal arts college in Ripon, Wisconsin. I had gone there with the hope of becoming a veterinarian. When Dad drove me up to Ripon, with Mom along, he said to me, ”you’ll be amazed at what your mother and I will learn over the next 4 years.” I thought this was quite profound as he had already had a college education, but yet he was still continuing to learn as his child did as she left for 4 years of college. Dad was so “joe college” as we grew up. He loved his beloved Scarlet Knights of Rutgers and taught us to sing all these dopey songs as we traveled in the summers to the East Coast. I remember one day at Ripon sitting in the cafeteria (after a few too many beers at happy hour) and I started singing, “on the banks of the Old Raritan” and one of my classmates from Ripon started singing it with me. I found out that her dad had attended Rutgers and graduated 10 years before my dad. I honestly didn’t think other kids had been subjected to songs like that, but I guess I was wrong. Thanks for those memories!!
After my freshman year I told Dad that I’d quit and go to MATC to become a vet tech since I got a D in Biology Stats…but he said, ”Peggy that’s okay you can go to MATC AFTER you graduate from Ripon.” So all these years later, I look back on my 4 years at Ripon as being 4 of the BEST years of my life. The things I learned at Ripon (in addition to the things in kindergarten) have helped me to become who I am today. The gift of being able to think out of the box was something that Ripon helped accentuate, but that my dad and mom instilled in us.
As the oldest, I felt this keen sense of responsibility to my mom and my dad. In the past many months, we could see that Dad was preparing us for his final journey. In my dog show world, we often term that place where old or infirmed animals go is to the Rainbow Bridge. Then they wait for their master to greet them when that master crosses the Bridge. Since my job affords me family leave time, I was able to be with my dad as he journeyed on to that better place. Over the past couple weeks my sister Mary and I kept vigil by Dad’s bedside with Mom. Paul and Ruth would call us from either coast and talk to Dad. I know that he knew we were all there and cared about him. His many friends that he made as he and Mom volunteered at the Care Center would stop by to see him. He actually waved to Mrs. Schiebles as she left his room after stopping to see him. The last thing I heard him speak were the words, “Hi, Paul,” as Mary put her cell phone to his ear. We joked that we were going to have to talk to him on cell phone so that he’d say hi to us. His illness took its toll and each day he failed more and more. We shared laughter and tears and stories often cracking up the nurses and staff around us. For those of you who don’t know us, that was our way of coping.
Thanks, Dad for all the good things that you taught my siblings and me. You taught us to live life to its fullest. However life’s little examples that you showed us very subtlely is your greatest legacy to Paul, Mary, Ruth and me. Your grandchildren will also inherit that legacy as it is now passed on to the next generation. And..as Mary and I promised you over and over, we will take care of Mom.
You always taught us to do our best. You did your best by your shining example for all of us.
Sleep warm, Dad. I love you. I will always miss you.
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Last year at this time, Dad celebrated his 77th birthday appropriately on the beach in Myrtle Beach, SC with Mom, Ruth, David, Zeke, Annie and Mary Jo. Several weeks later he would see his new grand-daughter Katherine Frances Gero be baptized in California. Who said this man didn't get around?? *grin* I remember at one time, he wanted to move to Australia....c'mon Mom...it would have been fun to have been down under....*lol*
And...a short month after that, he died.
But wait!!
I love moments in time. They give me a chance to remember everything in my life and those in my life, whenever I want. What a tremendous gift we, the living, have.
This moment in time today is dedicated to Robert B. Gero, who would have been 78 years young today!! Happy b-day, Dad!!
And now....I'm off to the traditional Madison area dog show, which usually seemed to occur on yours or Mary's b-days. This year, it's yours! Woof!
Labels: Dad, Moments in Time, Siblings
